This morning I got up bright, bright, bright and early...fixed myself a poached egg and a piece of soy sausage (its delicious, don't knock it until you try it)...forwent the coffee....put on my running clothes...and went to work.
Running clothes? At work? Well, no. I took the Work Capacity Test this morning, where I had to walk three miles carrying 45 pounds of weight in 45 minutes, all to prove that I am fit enough to work for the Fire Program. I did not think I would be able to do this. In fact, I told the guy administering the test that I may have to come back and take it again. Because despite my best efforts to be in a 30th-birthday-marathon training regime, I am not doing as well as I had hoped.
On top of being negative about my physical state, I should tell you that I've had kind of a rough weekend. For whatever reason, I let technology and meanie-heads get the best of me. This was unfortunate because I really have come a long way from this time last year, mentally and emotionally speaking.
Fortunately, I have a dear friend who is a newly minted life coach, and who was willing to give me some positive affirmations to think about this morning before the big test. Thank you, L!
Walking forward (because you can't run), I started listening to my iPod, which is full of very great music, all of which motivates even if the lyrics are a bit melancholy.
And I started thinking.
And then this song started playing.
The lyrics, in case you can't watch it, say:
I want to find myself a better state, where my stories will never be told
Won't have to worry about all my mistakes, once your body unravels, unfolds
No I can't wait to get to California
Even if it takes, even if it takes a toll
Your face still looks the same, the same as I wanted
And our love will never grow old
And I started remembering all that is good.
And just maybe, thinking back on all that I love about California is part of why I passed that test with 7 minutes to spare.